Managing Back-to-School Stress: Advice from Therapists

It’s time to pack our lunches, load our overpriced school supplies into an overstuffed backpack, and dive into another year of education. Whether you’re a student approaching another semester or a parent seeing their kids off to a new grade level, going back to school can bring up a lot of complicated feelings. 

Why does going back to school make us wonder if we need some serious therapy? What can we do to ease this difficult transition for us and the people around us? 

Lauren Mishkin is a counselor in St. Petersburg who knows what it’s like for students and mothers navigating the back to school season. Let’s learn what tools a therapist uses when back to school stress rears its ugly head.

“I did then what I knew how to do. Now that I know better, I do better.” – Maya Angelou

Why Am I So Stressed When It’s Time To Go Back To School?

Truthfully, there’s a lot of reasons you might feel stressed when the school year begins. It’s something a lot of us are talking about in therapy. This is a period of transition and adjustment, just like the holiday season, so we must be prepared for change and all the stress that comes along with it. 

Ask yourself, “Where is this stress living in my body? What might be causing it?”

• Burnout. School is a job, and we can be wildly burnt out from it even after a full summer of rest (and that’s not always on the table). If you’re still feeling burnout from the last school year, you’re naturally going to feel stress as you prepare to enter another one.
• Missing Your Children. When you’re a parent, your kids are your entire world. We attach to our children in a profound way that changes us somatically and psychologically. It can be challenging seeing them leave for school, especially if they’re going through intense emotions themselves! 
• Not Enough Self-Care. It doesn’t matter how much we accomplish or how many other people we take care of, if we aren’t taking care of ourselves, that’s a recipe for stress. It’s not just about watching the shows we want or reading a book we’re interested in, it’s about doing our daily acts of self-care that keep us energized and healthy.
• Seasonal Depression. As summertime comes to a close, we need to acknowledge the effect that the weather has on our emotions. Human beings are animals who rely on the sun for daily warmth and comfort. When it’s cold, rainy, or even just cloudy, we’re biologically predisposed to feel more stressed, anxious, and depressed. 

How Does A Therapist Handle Back To School Stress?

“In a year that for many of us, has already been full of change, back to school may feel like a burden rather than an adventure. As chill routines built over the summer fade, morphing into school year regimens, the second and third weeks of school can feel overwhelming for both parents and children. The financial stress of school supplies and clothes can add an extra burden to already taxed budgets and nervous systems during this time. Remember to give yourself some grace this season. No one parents perfectly. The goal is to stay regulated enough to create/maintain a safe container for children as they adjust to their new normal. 

Here are a few tips to stay regulated ENOUGH this season. 

• Get The Rest Your Body Needs. Try to get a decent night’s rest. Your body is a well-oiled machine, but it needs sleep to function properly. The less sleep we have, the harder it is to stay in a regulated system.
• Set Yourself Up For Success. Try to get time consuming tasks that can be done in advance, done the night before. Using a mantra like “My future self will thank me for this” can help build motivation to pick out outfits, pack nonperishable lunch items, and get backpacks sorted on weary weeknights. 
• Breathe Mindfully. Take a few minutes before the kiddos wake up to breathe in for 4 and exhale for 6. When we take conscious control over our breathing, it regulates your body and steadies your mind so that you can respond from clarity rather than reacting from tension.
• Consciously Scan Your Body. If feeling anxious, overstimulated, or frustrated- do a scan from the top of your head to the tips of your toes, noticing areas of tension  and trying to release that tension. (Key areas to note include the temples, jaw, neck, shoulders, lower abs, and pelvic floor.)
• Embodiment Over Dissociation. If feeling super low energy, shutdown, or frozen- do a scan starting at the tips of your toes going up to the top of your head. Try moving  muscles in each area and then relaxing them. Play your favorite hype song and allow yourself to dance or sing for a few. This is a great way to get energy moving through your body and lighten the mood. 
• Eat Enough Protein. Try to have some protein. Running on caffeine alone does not make for super regulated mornings. When our diet is balanced with enough protein, fiber, vitamins, and minerals, our mind and body have the opportunity to function even if everything else goes out of whack.

How To Find Anxiety Relief When You’re Going Back To School

Most important of all, remember to practice self-compassion. If you mess up, model self-awareness. Kids don’t need us to be perfectly regulated all the time. They need us to model what it looks like to self-regulate, own our mistakes, and return to a calmer, more connected place. Much of the magic of parenting happens in vulnerable repairs rather than perfection. Making statements like “This morning was messy. I wasn’t at my best. We will try again tomorrow.”  Can offer a sense of autonomy, build trust, and foster connection. Remember to get curious about their experiences when things get messy, ask for input, and be willing to strive to make changes if required.” – Lauren Mishkin

If you’re feeling overwhelmed and burnt out, therapy with Lauren can help. Lauren uses somatic therapy to support you in reconnecting with your body, calming your nervous system, and building tools that make life feel more manageable. This approach helps you release stress and regulate emotions so you can move through challenges more easily.

Click here to schedule a consultation to get started.

Sunny Ebsary is an educator, multi-modal artist, and writer specializing in the intersection of myth and mental health. Sunny’s writing walks the line between poetic and logical, giving readers a chance to interface with the mind and imagination. Sunny’s been putting pen to paper since he was a child, writing everything from albums, novels, and plays, to essays, interactive games, and of course, many articles! While studying both psychology and writing, he realized his real passion in life was helping others unlock their creative spark. Whether he’s leading a D&D game, directing a production, or diving deep into the brain, you can be sure Sunny will be ushering you toward finding meaning in your life.