Recognizing the inner critic can be a tremendous effort that takes a lifetime to fully master.

But the rest of your life starts today, so now is the perfect time to start. The inner critic is the name we give to our intrusive self-critical thoughts, and if left unchecked, it can become your greatest obstacle. We might excuse ourselves of this unkindness because we believe that it somehow motivates us, as though negativity has ever put wind in our sails, fuel in our tank, or cash in the bank. Letting the inner critic dictate the tone of our interior can leave us feeling drained, depreciated, and depressed; that’s the bad news. The good news is: there are tools you can use that really work. And I have a few to share with you. 

Identifying The Inner Critic With Empathy

Our inner critics often say things that seem like they’re coming from someone else. Under the fog of pain, we hurl insults at ourselves that we wouldn’t label our worst enemies with. If you couldn’t imagine yourself saying those things to a loved one, it’s likely the work of your inner critic. When we talk to ourselves, it should be with the tone we would take speaking to someone we love dearly. If a loved one made a mistake, we might get angry with them, but we would also try to lift them up and encourage them to be their highest self.

Examine Your Past

Oftentimes, our inner critics are inspired by the outer critics who made an impact on us in our past like our families, teachers, or bullies. When you catch your inner critic spouting familiar sentiments, explore that thought. Who in your past made that criticism and why did they make it? Was it truthful? What feelings did it make you feel, and why would it be important for you to hear those words again? It can be tough to learn from our past. The memories there can be overwhelming and charged with the intense emotionality of youth. But it is possible to heal from your past, and it is possible to separate from your inner critic. 

Separating From Your Inner Critic

When we analyze our own thoughts, it can be all too easy to get wrapped up in pride and attachment. By separating ourselves from the negative voice in our heads, we can observe our intrusive thoughts more objectively, and open up a pathway to healing from our old habits. When you feel yourself weighed down by the burden of your negative thoughts, try imagining the words of your inner critic as coming from an outside source with little respect or credibility. The more cartoonishly disreputable you picture your inner critic the easier is it to see through the illusion of your insecurities. One of the best ways to start separating yourself from the inner critic through art therapy. 

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Sunny Ebsary is an educator, multi-modal artist, and writer specializing in the intersection of myth and mental health. Sunny’s writing walks the line between poetic and logical, giving readers a chance to interface with the mind and imagination. Sunny’s been putting pen to paper since he was a child, writing everything from albums, novels, and plays, to essays, interactive games, and of course, many articles! While studying both psychology and writing, he realized his real passion in life was helping others unlock their creative spark. Whether he’s leading a D&D game, directing a production, or diving deep into the brain, you can be sure Sunny will be ushering you toward finding meaning in your life.