Change Your Thoughts: Trusting Yourself

It’s easy to find mental health advice online that boils down to comforting yourself and using your internal monolog in a gentler and more empathetic way. But what are you supposed to do if you don’t trust your own voice? What can you do to foster a sense of self-trust, and self-reliance? It starts with changing your thoughts. The stories that you tell yourself and the thoughts you think directly impact the space around you. If you want good things to happen, you need to think good thoughts. If you want to find your purpose, you need to start believing in yourself. Here are 5 ways to begin trusting yourself:

Be good on your word.

If you were looking to build trust with another person, one of the first things you’d expect from them would be honesty. Treat your relationship with yourself like you would a relationship with someone else. Building trust in a relationship doesn’t happen overnight. When you are good on your word, you can start to feel worthy, not just of other’s trust, but your own. By being truthful and honest, you can make the decision to trust yourself easy and obvious. 

Stick to a routine.

Your routine is a set of promises you make to yourself about your everyday life. Every day that you take care of yourself by following your routine is another promise kept, and another good reason to trust and rely on yourself. This must be done with love and compassion, not guilt or shame. Guilting yourself into sticking to a routine will only backfire. 

Embrace your kindness.

Perform a kind act without involving your ego. Kindness is from the heart, and it is an inner desire to help others and make things better for people. Don’t do it just to massage your ego or because it will impress people. Be kind because it’s the right thing to do. 

Rely on others.

While it’s vital to develop a sense of trust in your own perception, sometimes, it can be more enlightening to view ourselves through the lens of others. When you trust in others and have that trust honored, it makes it easier to trust yourself. Sometimes, we need others to help see ourselves more clearly. It can be easy to get lost in our own stories, but other people help pull us out of our illusions and bring us back to reality. 

Don’t be afraid to fail.

Are you so fearful of failure that you don’t  try at all? The fear of failure can be disabling. When we don’t know how or when to trust ourselves, it can be all too easy to become paralyzed with fear. Don’t let your fear of failure become a fear to take flight. Facing the possibility of failure and moving forward anyway will greatly enhance your self-confidence and make it easier for you to trust yourself. When you courageously step out of your comfort zone, you can prove to yourself that even though the outcome is uncertain, and you have no control, trying and failing will make you stronger, and it’s not as scary as your mind makes it out to be. Repeat the mantra “I accept life as it reveals itself to me.”

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Sunny Ebsary is an educator, multi-modal artist, and writer specializing in the intersection of myth and mental health. Sunny’s writing walks the line between poetic and logical, giving readers a chance to interface with the mind and imagination. Sunny’s been putting pen to paper since he was a child, writing everything from albums, novels, and plays, to essays, interactive games, and of course, many articles! While studying both psychology and writing, he realized his real passion in life was helping others unlock their creative spark. Whether he’s leading a D&D game, directing a production, or diving deep into the brain, you can be sure Sunny will be ushering you toward finding meaning in your life.